Friday, October 3, 2014

Dog Show Debauchery



 In the world of pageantry and competition, there is but one show that stands above all others. One that is unrivaled in showmanship, class, and prestige. It is a show of true passion, hard work, and fierce competition. Of course I’m talking about the Westminster Kennel Club Dog show! To those who don’t know a lot about the Westminster, it is an extremely old and precise dog show with probably way more rules and regulations than anyone could ever imagine.
At the core of all the tradition and decorum is a rigid set of standards. These standards are made according to the “basic purpose of dog shows,” which is to “facilitate the evaluation of breeding stock for use in producing the next generations.”
             There is a certain hierarchy in the competition. First there are groups. Every breed belongs to a group based on their bred purpose.  “Sporting” for example is dogs which are used for assisting hunters and “generally have high energy and stable temperaments,” Retrievers, pointers and, spaniels are some of the most common. “Hounds” are a group that broke off from sporting in 1930, but are very similar. “Working” dogs are generally service dogs like the German Sheppard. “Terriers” are dogs bred to pursue vermin. “Toy” dogs are small and bred for companionship. “Non-Sporting” was one of the two original groups (along with sporting obviously) but now just serves as a miscellaneous group; and finally there is “Herding.” These dogs were bred for, wait… you guessed it herding! These are the main groups, and then it is condensed into specific breeds.
            Currently there are 192 breeds allowed by Westminster, and just this week they announced the acceptance of 2 new breeds (Coton de Tulears and Vizslas). To judge each dog they use a written “standard” of what the ideal dog in that breed should look like. The standard of each breed is written and “maintained” by the club of that certain breed. The judgment standards are oddly descriptive in some portions but also extremely vague at other times. It is safe to say that it’s one of the weirdest things I’ve ever read.  For example thishttp://www.akc.org/breeds/pembroke_welsh_corgi/breed_standard.cfm  is the written standard for a Welsh corgi. It has a lot of ambiguous terminology, such as the description of the dog’s expression which should be “Intelligent and interested, but not sly.” Then there are other portions of the standard which are extremely exact, like the weight of the dog should be “in proportion to size, not exceeding 30 pounds for dogs and 28 pounds for bitches.”
            As if those standards weren’t enough to show just how odd this show is, there are also excessively strict, but telling, rules. For one, there is a specific law against using braces to straighten your dog’s teeth. There is also a specific “no tattooing” rule that prevents people from adjusting the natural colors of their canines. But those are just some of the most extreme rules. Almost as shocking though are the general processes that these people must do to make their dogs appear “showing quality.” According to the Associated Press “Scissors, blow dryers, bobby pins — they’re as much a part of the Westminster dog show as commands, crates and treats.” Apparently dogs can be prepped for hours before each show, getting bathed and pampered. That’s the point where I decided that this whole thing is just too much for me. The Westminster might be a little too high class for my taste. For god’s sake the dogs spend HOURS getting ready for the show. I’ve never spent hours getting ready for anything!
The total amount of hierarchical organization in this event is astounding. The standards are extremely detailed. It’s no surprise that this organization has been doing this for over 130 years, they have it down to an EXACT science. In that regard it’s impressive. But what I’m taking out of all this is that it is only entertaining to see on TV once a year; and that’s just because I like to watch dogs. The whole culture is full of borderline insane control freaks with undoubtedly too much time on their hands. I love dogs, but this is just absurd. For my money, I’d much rather get my pooch involved in something like this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKzkIlOe8mw .

 References 
- http://www.westminsterkennelclub.org/dogshows/aboutdogshows.html
- http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/2-new-dog-breeds-allowed-compete-westminster-kennel-club-dog-show-article-1.1958225
- http://www.westminsterkennelclub.org/
- http://www.dailyitem.com/news/entertainment/article_9f208f58-7732-5faa-81c9-6d5f28b1fbda.html




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