Airline Standard Woes

If there’s anything I’ve learned about writing internet pieces, negatively framed stories gain the most traction. So with that in mind, 2 weeks ago I had what many would call a sadly typical experience with airline travel. Everyone has experienced delays when flying. But why do we have to accept it? We pay astronomical fees from the ticket, to luggage, to the pretzels on the plain. Not only do we have to accept these highly inflated prices we subject ourselves to the full body searches and the never ending lines to remove our belts and shoes.

            But I digress. 2 weeks ago I recruited the talents of a major airline to transport me to NYC for the upcoming semester. I did everything right, instead of traveling out of my regional airport I drove over to Jacksonville so that I could take a direct flight. This would greatly cut down my chances of delays and completely remove the need for a connecting flight. Little did I know, it is impossible to escape the trap of the airlines.

            My day started out swimmingly. I arrived to the Airport 2 hours early, just like you’re supposed to do. I went through the gauntlet of airport security, narrowly avoiding a screaming match between the TSA worker and a disgruntled woman who apparently forgot her identification. I braved the security scanner and rapidly put my belt and shoes on in time so as I did not cause traffic jam. I even had time to grab a 10$ day old ham sandwich! Then the Air-travel gods realized that my day was going too smoothly.

            I walked up to my designated gate just as the incoming flight landed. It looked as though we would depart right on-time! Then there was a slight malfunction on the plane. The cargo door would not open. The passengers on the previous flight couldn’t leave, and we couldn’t even get on the plane yet. The attendant got on the intercom and gave us the classic “30 minute” spiel. It reminded me of the episode of 30 Rock where Matt Damon explains “30 minutes is just long enough for people not to ask questions but not too long so they get angry.” Two hours into the “30 minute delay” the airport decides that we could actually take the plane originally scheduled for JFK (I was flying into LaGuardia) that was sitting there literally the ENTIRE time. So in typical Air-travel fashion, the 6:05pm to LGA NYC finally departed at 8:35pm and basically by the time we landed everyone who had a connecting flight was probably doomed to lodging on the terminal floor for the night.

            Why are the standards in air travel so low? We pay obviously more money than the flight is worth (see http://atwonline.com/operations/us-major-airlines-earned-combined-232-billion-2010-net-income) to have the most stressful experiences humanly possible. At the very least the comfort of the flight should be of a higher quality ( I haven’t been able to extend my legs on a plane since I was 14). The standards are low, and we cannot do anything about it. The standard for punctuality is absurd, the standard for comfort is non-existent and the standard for affordability is inconceivable. At the very least one of those three categories should be reasonable enough for us to put up with the hassles of air-travel.